One Pearl of a Gal

That one time we threw her a birthday party and hired Elvis. (= She lovvveeedddd Elvis!

 That was the title of a paper I wrote in 5th grade, One Pearl of a Gal. We were asked to write a paper about a grandparent. I chose my father's mother: Nora Pearl Gradowski (Carter). This post is going to be about her.
 My Grammy was born April 9th, 1932 in Greenville, Tennessee. Somehow, details are unknown, she ended up in Chicago, Illinois. (But she still loved to make that Southern sweet tea!)

Grammy is on the left. Isn't she just beautiful? Center would have been my great-grandma. Right is a family friend.

Another fabulous picture. I wonder why they are so dolled up?
Grammy is on the left again.

 At that time, World War II was ending. My great uncle Eddie brought home a friend from the Navy. His name was William Arthur Gradowski. He and my Grammy fell in love and were married August 14, 1948. Yes, that made her 16 years old! But you know what? She loved that man forever. My Papa ended up with Alzheimer's. She cared for him day in and day out. Even when he was bed ridden she continued to lovingly care for him, turning him to avoid bed sores, feeding him, cleaning him, etc. My Papa passed away when I was just a baby on January 26, 1995. Years later she found a boyfriend, also named William, but she refused to remarry. I admired her dedication to my Papa so much.

Loving gaze.

And now he is looking lovingly at her.
As a Christmas gift a few years ago, one of my aunts put together a film full of family photos and videos. There is one video in which Papa is behind the camera and gets a bit, shall we say, distracted by Grammy.

 Growing up, my dad's family was always very close. Grammy lived with my aunt Deb and uncle Gus. We went there for Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween, and frequent visits. I'm fairly certain that I was the only grandchild that didn't get in trouble and have to fear the wrath of Grammy's house slipper. That's saying a lot since Grammy had over 20 grandchildren! I like to think that I was her favorite. (; Just like my dad likes to think that he was her favorite out of the 7 of her children.
 Grammy taught me many things like how to play card games: King's Corners and Solitaire. But most importantly she taught me to never let your man see you without your eyebrows and lipstick on! Seriously, this lady always used to say "I've got to go put my face on. Bill is coming over soon. I can't let him see me without my eyebrows!" (She was one of the unfortunate ladies that didn't have any eyebrows and therefore had to pencil them completely on.)
 Grammy passed away January 9th, 2014. I was so grateful to have been home on Christmas break. I was so thankful to be one of the few to spend her last moments with her. For the past two years or so Grammy had been hospitalized a lot. I lived in constant fear that she would pass away while I was at school and I would never get to say goodbye. Grammy was no stranger to the hospital and has been known to make miraculous recoveries.

I believe this was after open heart surgery. Her response to "How are you feeling?"

 This time was different and everyone knew it. She was no longer awake and talking when I arrived at the hospital with my family, but she stayed like that for days. I was there all day, everyday. On the last night I insisted on staying the night in the hospital. I told my dad that I wanted to be there. Honestly, I wanted to be there for him more than anything. He was quite the mommy's boy and I felt horrible for what he was going through. I loved my Grammy, but that was the woman that raised him.
 That night my dad, Calvin, and I ate a pizza from a place across the street from the hospital. Calvin left. I told him that I'd call him if anything happened since Grammy loved him so much in the short 2 and half years she had known him. It was getting late and my dad decided to take the leftover pizza to the car. One of my cousins and I decided to ask the nurses for some pillows and blankets and try to find a place to sleep. My cousin leaned over, gave our Grammy a kiss, and as we walked out the door to the nurses station. They said they would find what they could for us. We walked back to the room where one of my other cousins, a nurse who had been timing Grammy's breathing, said that she hadn't taken a breath since we left. She brought the nurses in and they checked her pulse. They sadly shook their heads at us. I instantly looked up at the clock; 1:20 am central time. Her last breath had been when my cousin had kissed her.
 I waited by the elevator for my father. I was so upset that he wasn't there all because of a stupid pizza. I was so angry at that darn pizza at the time. As soon as the doors opened he knew she had gone. He could read it on my face.
 Immediate family was called first. I then took off to a private room to call Calvin and give him the news. Within hours of all the calls, all of my aunts and uncles were in the room with us (the only person missing was my uncle Tom, but he had also been having health problems). My uncle Bob had even come all the way from Chicago to be with us.
 It was in that moment that I realized how much I idolized my Grammy. Standing there seeing the love coming from her children, I realized that she was the reason that I want to have a big family. Why had it taken me that long to realize this? Did Grammy ever know how much I looked up to her?
 I still struggle with missing her. About two months later I tried to call her on my way home from class only to realize that I couldn't call her ever again. And just about a week ago I was thinking about how much I'd love to play King's Corners with her again. In fact, the day after she passed away I had Calvin run me back to my apartment in Bloomington so that I could pick up one of my black dresses to wear to the funeral. While there I bought a fancy pink pack of cards and taught Calvin how to play King's Corners.
 Grammy loved the Chicago Cubs and bingo and hummingbirds. I played bingo this summer. I sat right where she used to sit. She must have been mad that I was in her spot because I didn't win anything! And now every time I see a hummingbird I think of her. April 4th I'm getting a memorial tattoo for her. I told the guy I'd like to incorporate the Cubs, bingo, and hummingbirds into it. We will see how that craziness works out!

 I love you Grammy. I'm sorry that the Cubs never won the World Series for you.

I started stitching this the last night in the hospital. I finished it the next day and placed it in the casket with her. It match the embroidery on the inside perfectly. My family had picked a casket that had a hummingbird embroidered on the inside!